Ultrasound

We had our "find out what sex it is" ultrasound today.  The doctor was unable to tell if it was a boy or a girl, but he did say that he is pretty sure that the baby's biological dad is the Crypt Keeper.  I think he might be right:

P.S.  Just kidding, its a girl.  

P.P.S.  We aren't going to show the ultrasound pic to our kids.  They have a hard time sleeping after an intense episode of "The Wizards of Waverly Place."  I don't think they could handle seeing what is growing inside their mom's belly right now.  

Craigslist Anime Thing

Best way to convince an anime nerd that he is a skinny weakling: have him create an anime weapon and try to use it/carry it in the real world.

Nate, would you please explain to us all what is going on here. 

Homemade Wolfwood's CrossPunisher gun from Trigun. Cosplay GOLD. (Cheyenne)

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Date: 2010-05-02, 8:24AM MDT
Reply to: sale-3w79w-1720567370@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}

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That's right, look no further, anime fan.

A few years back, I want to NDK (Nan Desu Kan, an anime convention) in Denver, and with my awesome craftmanship, I had planned on making Wolfwood's crosspunisher so I could cosplay as him. If you've seen the anime, you know the CrossPunisher is a big metal cross that opens up and has a rocket launcher built into it.

This fact made me happen upon a small snafu: I am a thin weakling.

So, I made the cross out of things I deemed liftable: PVC tubing, styrofoam, a wooden circular handle (for the skull in the intersecting parts) and duct tape.

Yes. Duct tape.

I carved the slats of styrofoam into what I could shape into a cross, and took some PVC tubing and bored holes into a PVC gasket to attach the tubes into to give it shape and weight. I carved out half-circle tunnels into the styrofoam slats, applied them onto the PVC tubing, and duct taped the hell out of it. In the center piece, we carved two pieces of wood into a skull shape to look like the handle, and we gorilla glued the sucker into place, so it's not going anywhere.

Then, I coated it in duct tape, because A) Duct tape is not metal, therefore liftable by skinny people such as myself and B) Duct tape at least sort of looks like metal.

After that, it was all aesthetics. I bored in some screws to give it an industrial look, I put some wood slats on there to make it resemble the cross used in the anime/manga, I bored circles into the machine gun part to make it look like, well, a machine gun.

It was a SMASH hit at NDK. I was stopped nearly every two minutes or so for photos. It was incredible.

Is it cheaply made? I wouldn't say so, really. Did I work my ass off on it still? Sure did. This was about a month long process. Overall, I was pleased, but still cautious, so I had a friend tailor me the shroud. You know what I'm talking about, the white cloth with all the belts that goes over it? Well, belts are expensive, so I used more duct tape to look like belts, and what's cool about the shroud is it fits somewhat loosely over the cross, and has a zipper for quick, easy access. So you can tie one of your own belts around it and carry it like Wolfwood did, or you can unzip that sucker and attack the neighborhood dogs with it. It's really up to you.

Basically, what I want is for someone to come take this off my hands. I'd like to make a little cash on it since I worked nonstop for a month on it, however, so I'll say I'm looking for at least $50. I'll give it to the best offer to email me and pick it up.

Thanks for checking it out!

-James 

Goodbye Sweet Hitler

We found this gem in the Evanston newspaper a couple weeks ago. We were thinking about sending in a letter to the editor about how excited we were that Cupid Hitler III's reign of terror was over

Google Voice at it again...

So the perverted Google Voice transcriptionists are at it again.  Kim got this message this morning.

The transcription read: "Hey Kim, It's Andy, Can you give me a call as soon as you know that I know it's a choice sex self just give me a call. Thanks. Bye."

Two questions: What is a "choice sex self" and who is Andy?

embarrassing moment

I know this isn't a personal story, and we kind of have an unwritten rule that you post only personal stuff here, but I read this the other day and laughed really hard...really hard.  I edited it slightly to keep it PG-13 rated.  I'm not even sure if this is real, but...

So I walked around all morning totally oblivious to the fact that I had an old sock sticking out of my pant leg.  What is your most embarrassing moment? 

Response 12: 

"So I was sitting there in my philosophy class trying to crack my back in my chair, and this hot girl saw me, really, really hot.  I kind of had a thing for her for a couple of months, and we smiled at eachother and stuff but she sat pretty far away so we didn’t say much more than “hi.”  Anyway she saw me doing that and it was before class actually started so we could move around and stuff, so she came up and offered to crack me back for me, and I thought it was kind of weird, but I accepted.  So I stand up and she crosses me arms in front of me and stands right behind me and sort of picks me up onto her and bounces me (have you ever seen people crack backs this way?  I have seen it, but it is weird to explain)

Anyway, it wasn’t working, so she tried a huge bounce.  Something popped really loudly, but then when she sat me down I couldn’t feel my legs it was like they were totally asleep.  So I freaking collapsed in a heap on the ground, my legs going off in weird directions.  Then I heard a hella loud farting noise and proceeded to diarrhea in my pants, I was so embarrassed and I looked up at her face and she was just disgusted and everybody was like what the hell is going on so I tried to get up and run away, but my legs didn’t work.  I couldn’t move, and over the next thirty seconds or so my colon empties really loudly.  My teacher was hella mad and thought I was just being a freak crapping on the floor, but after a while they realized I wasn’t kidding around and they called an ambulance.

So I went to the hospital, and it turns out when she cracked my back somehow my spinal cord got pinched in between my vertebrae and they straightened it out with some emergency surgery and now I’m completely fine

So…I never went back to that school.”