Google Voice at it again...

So the perverted Google Voice transcriptionists are at it again.  Kim got this message this morning.

The transcription read: "Hey Kim, It's Andy, Can you give me a call as soon as you know that I know it's a choice sex self just give me a call. Thanks. Bye."

Two questions: What is a "choice sex self" and who is Andy?

embarrassing moment

I know this isn't a personal story, and we kind of have an unwritten rule that you post only personal stuff here, but I read this the other day and laughed really hard...really hard.  I edited it slightly to keep it PG-13 rated.  I'm not even sure if this is real, but...

So I walked around all morning totally oblivious to the fact that I had an old sock sticking out of my pant leg.  What is your most embarrassing moment? 

Response 12: 

"So I was sitting there in my philosophy class trying to crack my back in my chair, and this hot girl saw me, really, really hot.  I kind of had a thing for her for a couple of months, and we smiled at eachother and stuff but she sat pretty far away so we didn’t say much more than “hi.”  Anyway she saw me doing that and it was before class actually started so we could move around and stuff, so she came up and offered to crack me back for me, and I thought it was kind of weird, but I accepted.  So I stand up and she crosses me arms in front of me and stands right behind me and sort of picks me up onto her and bounces me (have you ever seen people crack backs this way?  I have seen it, but it is weird to explain)

Anyway, it wasn’t working, so she tried a huge bounce.  Something popped really loudly, but then when she sat me down I couldn’t feel my legs it was like they were totally asleep.  So I freaking collapsed in a heap on the ground, my legs going off in weird directions.  Then I heard a hella loud farting noise and proceeded to diarrhea in my pants, I was so embarrassed and I looked up at her face and she was just disgusted and everybody was like what the hell is going on so I tried to get up and run away, but my legs didn’t work.  I couldn’t move, and over the next thirty seconds or so my colon empties really loudly.  My teacher was hella mad and thought I was just being a freak crapping on the floor, but after a while they realized I wasn’t kidding around and they called an ambulance.

So I went to the hospital, and it turns out when she cracked my back somehow my spinal cord got pinched in between my vertebrae and they straightened it out with some emergency surgery and now I’m completely fine

So…I never went back to that school.”